BigJewReview

Big Jew goes to Chiltern Firehouse

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The name Chiltern Firehouse escalated quicker than the countries hatred for Perez Hilton in his tiny little speedos (seriously why does he carry round a gym water bottle with him everywhere he goes?!)…. and that’s saying something! Being a Big Jew on a diet  I naturally wanted to try it out. Overall, it’s a cool place, but I think people go for the name rather than the food. This is most likely due to the fact that their main clientele (from what I could see) were coke-addicted ladies who leisure. By leisure I mean throw up their food. So, yes the food was great (especially the desserts I hasten to add), but it’s more of a place to be seen – rather than unbelievably delicious food, especially as it cost dolla dolla bill.

To start we had some bar snacks. Cornbread fingers which came with what I thought was butter but turned out to be bacon fat, sweet corn type thingy. Unbelievably delicious. Not very Big Jew on a diet. Oh well. We also had crab donuts. Crab in a donut! Now I’ve heard everything.

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For starters I ordered Jerusalem artichoke and truffle, Charlie ordered sea trout sashimi. Charlie thought the sea trout tasted of pussy (not that he’d know), so I switched with him. It did indeed taste of pussy (not that I’d know either). Anyway, I still managed to polish off the whole thing. The J’Slam artichoke was delicious and would get again. Seeing as neither of us like pussy, I wouldn’t get the sea trout again. I forgot to take a picture of the sea trout as I was so overwhelmed with the pussy thing. Here’s the artichoke – it had a creamy thing on top with hazelnuts and truffle:

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Then came the mains. I had salmon which was sweet, yet salty and delicious. Charlie had monkfish (the most expensive thing on the menu – dick). It was worth it though. Although really rich, it had a great balance of textures and flavour flaves.

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For dessert we had the salted chocolate tart which was insane and “milk and honey” which was even more insane. Milk and honey comprised of honey jelly, milk ice-cream and honeycomb bits. It was sensational. I’d go back just for the desserts… and the bar snacks…. and the salmon.

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To wrap things up, I loved it. It’s pricey, but worth it. Overall, I give it 8 Star of Davids.

Don’t want flesh unless you got buns hun

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I hope you got the Nicki Minaj reference there – if not then get off my blog ASAP – unless you’re my mum – you’re allowed

So I decided to take a break from my evergreen diet and visit Flesh & Buns, which has been top of my list for a while now. It’s sister restaurant Bone Daddies is only like my favourite place ever in London (see blog post here for that BigJew Review, to which I gave 7 Stars of Davids).

The restaurant it’s pretty London genezza – dark, loud, hot gay waiters. However, one of the refreshing differences about F&B is the menu variety – this isn’t your standard 2 item menu that’s so popular at the moment. I wouldn’t call this place Japanese, more like everything you love about every asian food you can think of – sweet, sticky, crispy, salty, coriandery – mixed with a burger joint.

To start we had Chicken Wings (almost as good as the Patty & Bun ones) – they were crispy on the outside, soft on the inside and coated in a sweet, sour sesame sauce. I stole the picture below from another blog because I was too engrossed on eating them that I forgot to take a picture soz. They were probs the best thing we had there. The seafood ceviche was nice & fresh, but pretty irrel if you asked me. The sushi was above the shit you’d get from Tesco, but not quite Nobu.

Bowlful of glistening Korean chicken wings at Flesh & Buns

Now to the flesh & bun bit – they serve you sticky bun things like you’d get in a dim sum place and then you shove different fillings in. We ordered pork, duck & salmon. All three were pretty good – the pork was soft and sweet with the apple puree and the duck was like a souped-up version of your standard duck pancakes. My favourite was the salmon actually – crisp, soft and tasted like hoisin-teryaki. It was boom.

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Overall it’s definitely worth a visit. It’s new and interesting. However, putting my BigJew hat on I’d say that it was quite overpriced for what it was and don’t go hungry. I give it 6 Stars of Davids.

Why I think ‘All About That Bass’ by Meghan Trainor promotes binging like a MOFO

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In case you don’t know her yet, Meghan Trainor is popping up all over the shop with her new song ‘All About That Bass’. See the song here. The song is all about being comfortable with your size, telling us to not follow the photoshopping crowd. Now ordinarily I’d be all over a song like this, but I actually found myself eating more this weekend due to it’s messaging. Yes, that’s right, the song made me binge.

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A few of my favourite lyrics from the song are:

“Yeah, my mama she told me don’t worry about your size. She says, “Boys like a little more booty to hold at night.”

Yeah, that’s what my mama said and I ended up being 22 stone I was 17. Lol JK she had to padlock the food cupboard (true story).

The second lyric that made me eat were:

“But I’m here to tell ya every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top”

I was literally singing with with a buttercream enriched piece of cake in my mouth.

What’s my point here? Well, I don’t know if it’s due to my lack of willpower, but when I hear a song like this it makes me content with my size and therefore makes me eat. So, I guess what I’m trying to say is the fact that I didn’t lose any pounds this week can be blamed on Meghan Trainor. Cheers, ya bitch.

Anyone else think this, or am I on glue? I give the song 7 star of Davids.

BJOD X

64 Degrees Brighton Review

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So it was Charlie’s birthday and I decided to take him to the a totally hyped-up new restaurant in Brighton – 64 degrees. I have to say that the hype was completely deserved. It was one of the best meals I’ve had in a long time. The chefs cook modern english-style tapas plates right in front of your eyes. Think Benihana crossed with a michelin star gasto-pub. These were our favourites… OK it’s like every dish on the menu lol.

Buffalo chicken wings with blue cheese foam – crispy, spicy, cheesy, messy. So boom.

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Salmon gravalax with pickled veggies and horseradish cream. Fresh, light and full of flavour flave

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Roasted cauliflower, pomegranate and cauliflower puree – most definitely our favourite vegelesbian dish.

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Scallops with orzo (kinda like Isralie cous de la cous). Sweet, yet salty goodness coming from these bad boys.

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Slow poached egg, spinach and cod. This was nice, but packed the least punch I’d say.

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Textures of chocolate… Does what it says on the tin – was incredible.

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If ever you’re in Brighton this place should be your FIRST port of call. This place gets 10 out of 10 star of Davids 🙂

The World’s Biggest Brunch Buffet & The 5 Golden Buffet Rules

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Hey Guys,

There are three words which every big jew can’t resist – brunch, buffet and all-you-can-eat. So, whilst I’m sitting at the desk with back-to-diet-post-holiday blues, i’ve been reminiscing about all the incredible food Dubai had to offer. Take a look at the biggest brunch buffet in the world. Boozy brunches have become the norm in Dubai, but this one at the Al Qasr hotel is by far the biggest and best.

There are 5 golden rules when it comes to all you can eat buffets: 

1. Don’t fill up on bread – it’s cheap and is a major filler

2. If it’s expensive, get it. Even if you don’t like it. I had 5 lobsters. That’s where you make your dolla dolla bill back

3. Go to the loo halfway through. Make way for more food.

4. Mix sweet and savoury… The variation will keep pushing you to new heights

5. DON’T PEAK TOO EARLY! (Charlie did lol)

Dirty weekend in Manchester

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Hey guys, I had a great weekend in Manchester visiting some old friends (I went to uni there). I’ve addressed the fact that I screwed up on my diet in this post here. Anyway, I was really impressed with the new restaurants that have popped up since I left. If you ever go, here’s where I recommend (p.s. if you’re feeling hungry PLEASE IGNORE THIS POST):

Home Sweet Home – Rated 8 star of Davids… website here 

Chicken bites, sweet potato fries, slaw, blue cheese and BBQ dip. Heaven

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Dirty fries for dirty whores

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Gingers Comfort Emporium – Rated 8 star of Davids – more info here 

I had the salted caramel peanut butter… it was like a Reece’s cup jizzed on my face

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Tea Cup – very good cakes here…. 6 star of Davids for this one … more info here

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Akbars – 9 star of Davids… this place is my favourite all time curry in Manchester… just look at the naan breads! We had to come back and visit here. Website info here 🙂

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Bone Daddies

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Charlie and I went to Bone Daddies tonight – a ramen join in Soho. It was incredible. Ramen isn’t exactly a new thing to London, but this ramen makes Wagamama’s look like piss. The amount of flavour, textures and ingredients they stuff into one bowl makes for an exciting meal. Whilst it might not be as low in calories as a cup of soup, it certainly makes up for it in taste and originality. Good stuff 🙂

Rating: 7 star of Davids

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The Sweet 3 Miso Ramen – sweet, rich, filling

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